i won't let you close enough to hurt me , again

Must be brave enough

Remember when i said you were better than me because you were skinnier , prettier , richer , and much more voluptuous ? Well , i was wrong . You're not , you're not better . It's not even comparable because we're two different people . You're skinny , pretty , voluptuous , gorgeous and social but you're also a very undicided person , an easily changed mind , a self conscious and you're too popular . Instead , i am fat , not that pretty , not social , not gorgeous , not self conscious and i'm also not an easily changed minded person , i have low self-steem , i'm insecure , i fake smiles and i'm not good enough . Not comparable , we're opposite sides . 

Sometimes i just wish we were not that different . Sometimes having someone that understands and supports me again would be good . Sometimes i miss you so much i can't help it but cry . Sometimes i just wish i could matter what i mattered one year ago . Sometimes i wish i could say "She's my best friend" and know that it was a reciprocal feeling .

I can't give you, the heart you think you gave me ,

Anna